An Awful Chinese Restaurant Joke Just Wrote Itself

At least she wasn’t wielding a sword? A knife-wielding woman assaulted three people in an attempted robbery early Wednesday at a Perry County convenience store. [H-L]

Aww, Mittens Romney is less popular than George W. Bush. The national survey, conducted by Bloomberg News and released Wednesday, found that Bush received a favorable rating of 46 percent, while Romney’s favorable rating was 43 percent. [HuffPo]

President Barack Obama maintains a lead (49-42) over Republican challenger Mittens Romney with 40 days left until the November 6 election, the latest Reuters/Ipsos poll said on Thursday. [Reuters]

Ruh ro – the state DUI instructor pleaded guilty to falsifying DUI program completion forms. [OAG Release]

General JC Christian, Patriot, points us to these sad LDS sex-rules that are doubtless responsible for making Miffed and Egg Romney such delightful humans to be around. [Wonkette]

A Chinese restaurant forced to shut its doors after getting caught with a dead deer in the kitchen. It happened Thursday afternoon at the Red Flower Chinese Restaurant in Williamsburg. [WKYT]

Illegal mafia organ transplant guy, Michael Karpf, sent this out: Sergio Melgar will no longer be Chief Financial Officer or Senior Vice President of UK HealthCare. Murray Clark has agreed to assume the duties of the Chief Financial Officer on an interim basis. A search for a permanent Chief Financial Officer will begin soon. [UK Email Blast]

Rumors that the Army has a long-term plan to phase out conventional operations at the Blue Grass Army Depot are just that, rumors, according to Brig. Gen. Kevin O’Connell, head of the Army’s Joint Munitions Command. [Richmond Register]

To curb prescription drug abuse, Kentucky started in July requiring people with long-term prescriptions for controlled substances to submit to urine testing. The tests determine if patients take their drugs, rather than sell them, and if other, unprescribed drugs are in their systems. [John Cheves]

Under Romney’s proposed health care plan, American families buying non-group health insurance would pay nearly double what they pay under Obamacare, according to a new study by Families USA entitled “ObamaCare versus RomneyCare versus RomneyCandidateCare.” [HuffPo]

A car ran a stop sign and struck a JCPS school bus en route to Frost Middle School Friday morning, causing the bus to overturn and sending 51 students to area hospitals, officials said. [C-J/AKN]

Accused Colorado gunman James Holmes made threats to a university psychiatrist before a July shooting at a midnight screening of “The Dark Knight Rises” that killed 12 people, according to court documents released on Friday. [Reuters]

One thought on “An Awful Chinese Restaurant Joke Just Wrote Itself

  1. “The Difference Between Bush and Romney”

    George W.: “Mitt, it’s amazin’ you’re more unpopular than me. I admit I bungled horribly both diplomatically (I hardly know the word) and domestically (how do you spell ‘economy’?).

    Mitt: “You had a more winning personality. The dumb public wanted to share beer with you. I don’t drink beer–or even coffee. I’m sunk.”

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