Ark Parkers and Steve Beshear will lose their shiz in 3, 2… because human evolution is still happening. [Big Think]

UPS is eliminating 542 jobs in Northern Kentucky. Don’t worry, everything is puppies and rainbows in Kentucky! [Enquirer]

That Audubon book? It sold for $7.9 million. [Reuters]

The prescription drug epidemic is out of control like woah. Meanwhile, a handful of paid-for-by-Hal Rogers folks are fighting to make it worse. [Investigate West]

This explains why President Barack Obama detoured to thank Defense Secretary Leon Panetta last night. [NPR]

A corrupt Paintsville pain clinic was raided by law enforcement for the second time in a year. [C-J/AKN]

We were wondering what happened to gay orange person Charlie Crist. Turns out Newt Gingrich ate him! [Politico]

How is it, exactly, that reflective safety tape is any different than a reflective triangle on an Amish buggy? [Bluegrass Politics]

Steve Beshear loves to pretend that Kentucky is great on the business tax front. Unfortunately? It ranks 22nd in the nation. [Business First]

An overwhelming majority of people believe that Mittens Romney – like most politicians – will say anything to get elected. [Daily Kos]

Four individuals want to replace Joe Peek as the faculty trustee on the University of Kentucky board of trustees. Which yes man will win? [H-L]

If you aren’t stalking Jake on Twitter, you may have missed news that Newt Gingrich is officially filed as a candidate in Kentucky. [Twitter]

Here’s the first clip of Richie Farmer’s feller on that Amazing Race show. Lawwwd. [CBS]

This Thursday at 10:00 A.M., Commissioner of Agriculture Jamie Comer will attend the State Fair Board meeting in Louisville. Comer needs to bring up the fact that the state still owes Ed Hart millions of dollars that he put up to get the Kentucky Kingdom deal going. It’s time for the state to start screwing people over like that. [Press Release]

Rand Paul’s staff is hitting back over the TSA’s semantics play with today’s Nashville detainment/delay/whatever. [Daily Caller]

Remember when he was angry over TSA pat downs?

Now Rand is getting super-suspcious and is going all “time for a Senate inquiry” on the TSA. [TPM]

Jack Conway spent most of last week claiming that Kentucky’s pill problem was drying up. Then the State-Journal ran a story that was, ahem, quite the contrary. This Wednesday is grand jury day in Franklin County and we hear even more pill indictments will roll out. Expect a big story in that paper on Thursday about pills and organized crime. Jack would have known about this massive problem that’s getting worse in Central Kentucky if he’d bothered to work with Sheriff Pat Melton. [Whoopsiedaisy]

The Supreme Court of the United States ruled that the government violated privacy rights in its GPS tracking case. [ACLU]

Remember Todd Lally? Now he wants to run for the newly-created 10th District State House seat in Eastern Jefferson County. [Ryan Alessi]

Neither Jim Gray nor Greg Fischer are joining their colleagues in the Mayors for the Freedom to Marry. [Here & Here]

Who exactly are the 1 percent? The very rich in America increasingly work in finance, marry each other and care about politics. [The Economist]

Go read this story about Super PACs and how crazy they are. [Pro Publica]

80% of Americans want full disclosure of meetings between Congresspeople and regulators. [Rasmussen Reports]

Maybe Jamie Comer should think twice about firing the state apiarist to give the job to one of his friends. [H-L]

Here’s Steve Beshear cutting mine safety funds just months after mining deaths. This is why Kentucky can’t have nice things. It’s entertaining watching outsiders act all surprised that this sort of thing goes on in Frankfort. [Think Progress]

Here are a few of the questions:

CLICK TO ENLARGE

The text, if you can’t load the image at work or on your mobile phone:

Kentucky State law says the Kentucky Lottery cannot advertise where the money goes. Do you think the Lottery should be allowed to advertise where the money is spent? Yes, No, I don’t know.

Next question:

CLICK TO ENLARGE

The text:

There has been legislation proposed that would allow video lottery and/or slot machines at the horse tracks. These would be run by the Kentucky Lottery and the money they earned would benefit the state. How favorable would you be to this? Very favorable, Somewhat favorable, Neutral, Somewhat unfavorable, Very unfavorable

And this question, which seems to be leading toward online gambling:

Text:

Do you like the idea of playing a lottery game on your computer? Yes, No, I don’t know

It’s really interesting to come across this during the legislative session, to say the least. Copyrighted Kentucky Lottery imagery was used for the poll/survey/research, so we can’t help but assume the Lottery Corp is involved and spending Lottery money to fund the effort.

So let the speculation begin.

Tomorrow, Susan “chickens in the yard” Westrom will file legislation pushing a statewide smoking ban. This is a good thing. [Press Release]

Make your own racist newsletter with this fancy magnetic Ron Paul Kit! It is terrific. [Gawker]

Today Congressman John Yarmuth introduced the Muhammad Ali Legacy Act in Warshington. [The 'Ville Voice]

The Legislative Ethics Commission chimes in saying everyone backed the Keith Hall fine. Unfortunately, Ethics folks still privately tell us that state law doesn’t allow them to go far enough with their punishment. [Page One - We Get Comments]

Julian Carroll has apparently gotten so old and forgetful that he believes Steve Beshear got the tax reform effort in Kentucky started. [State-Journal]

Here’s Jim Ramsey complaining about budget cuts. He still wants a hospital merger or a management contract for University Hospital. Note that there was no discussion of his massive pay raise. [FOX41]

Looks like the teabaggers have caused the tea party to start going cold. [The Hill]

The Supreme Court holds the fate of Medicaid in its hands. Which could spell bad news for states like Kentucky. [Politico]

In a positive move, that same court rejected an appeal over predominantly christian prayer at public meetings. Something that is sure to outrage the faux family set. [HuffPo]

You should probably go tell your meemaw that there’s some fancy strain of TB in India that can’t be cured. [BBC]

What this Mitt Romney 15% tax rate headline fails to mention is that he’s only taxed 15% on investments. An important clarification. He probably pays way less than that in actual income taxes. [Reuters]

A majority of Americans believe that former President George W. Bush is more responsible than President Obama for the current economic problems in the country, according to a new Washington Post-ABC News poll. [WaPo]

Yesterday, former prosecutor Carol Cobb filed to run for Commonwealth’s Attorney in Jefferson County. [Press Release]

Did you see Kelly Flood text messaging during the prayer/invocation at the budget address last night? [Funny How That Works]

Last night, Papaw Beshear gave his annual budget address. If you want to skim over it, click the clicky. There are no surprises. [Click the Clicky]

Beshear’s decision to maintain funding for the prison system while cutting funds for the already struggling Kentucky State Police, prosecutors and Administrative Office of the Courts is shortsighted and, frankly, dumb as hell. [H-L]

Who’ll replace Danny Ford now that he’s retiring from the State House? [Press Release]

Here’s more on Ford’s retirement. After 7,000 years in the state legislature. He’s apparently being shipped off to a rest home somewhere. We’ll try to find out when visiting hours are. [WKYT]

Chuck Schumer’s brother gave Mitch McConnell $1,000 last fall and that is apparently a big deal. It’s apparently shocking to find out that Warshington insiders play pat-a-cake with each other. [Politico]

Here they go trying to make the University of Pikeville a public university without any sort of study or solid proof that it’s worth it. Common sense, as an Eastern Kentuckian, says it’s not. [C-J/AKN]

Maybe you should take a look at the latest Big Mac Index. Sometimes it’s an eye-opener when it comes to economic realities. [The Economist]

Seriously, what the hell is in the water in Laurel County? Is it trying to turn into the new Clay County? [WLEX18]

Don’t forget that bourbon legend Joy Perrine was on a fancy drinking show and you should watch it. [Page One]

A year later, it looks like voters’ views of Republicans are dimming. Favorability was 36-51 last year. Now it’s 29-58. [Daily Kos]

From the Department of Things That Actually Happened: Rick Perry called on a mannequin with its hand raised to ask him a question. [Wonkette]

Did President Barack Obama give up on diplomacy too soon when it came to Iran? [The Economist]

Surely we’re not the only folks excited to see how many millions of dollars Newt Gingrich has wasted on jewels and shiz. [Politico]

Rick Perry says it’s just a kid mistake for Marines to urinate on Afghan corpses. Yep, just a kid mistake and not a nightmare for diplomacy. [CNN]

What does Ron Paul want out of this presidential race stunt thing he’s got going on? [The Hill]

You are super-excited that Kentucky’s public universities are bracing for cuts and performance-based funding. As Jim Ramsey rakes in millions and Shirley Q rakes in just as much. [Ryan Alessi]

A record 84 percent of Americans say they disapprove of the way the Congress is doing its job compared with just 13 percent who approve of how things are going, according to a Washington Post/ABC News poll. [Reuters]

Cutting-edge text analytics are helping the Obama campaign determine voters’ hopes and fears. [Slate]

Indiana issued the nation’s first LGBT license plate. Faux Family Foundation folks are freaking out. [The Bilerico Project]

On Thursday, Jamie Comer will attend a press conference to introduce industrial hemp legislation with Richard Henderson. On Friday night, he’ll eat porkchops in Bowling Green. [Press Release]

The weather was crazy today, it was 60 degrees and there were all kinds of tornaders. Just like Frankfort. [H-L]

People are still freaking out over First Lady Michelle Obama’s “angry black woman” remark because they’re afraid to deal with race. [The Hill]

• 53% oppose requiring a prescription for medications containing pseudoephedrine
• 41% support it
• 77% said that this statement was a reason to oppose a prescription requirement: “Requiring a prescription for medicines like Advil Cold & Sinus, Claritin D, and Sudafed punishes the consumers and not the criminals. Kentucky should be passing laws that go after the meth criminals instead of punishing law-abiding citizens.”
• 74% support strengthening the current MethCheck system as a means of combating meth

And check out these key key district breakdowns:

• 63% in the 2nd District oppose Rx, only 31% support it
• 59% in the 4th District oppose Rx, only 29% support it

And you wonder why we think the legislature needs a reality check.

It would behoove the CHPA and others involved to release complete polling data. Would also be nice if legislators ignorantly pushing something they haven’t bothered to fully comprehend would bother examining a piece of legislation’s true cost to Kentuckians and the state in general.

Meanwhile, Miss Linda and a handful of others can’t refute what constituents want and what the facts say – so they just foam at the mouth about us being on the take or whatever. Won’t change reality, though.

Kentuckians already know there’s going to be a wild Republican primary to replace Geoff Davis in the 4th District. [Roll Call]

Kentucky’s getting $4,577,316 from the feds to cover April 2011 storm damages to roads & bridges. [Press Release]

What a travesty! Alison Lundergan Grimes appointed communications staffers but did not appoint the meemaws to anything! [Facebook]

Congressman John Yarmuth filed for re-election today and unlike other outlets, we don’t see what’s major or newsworthy about it to warrant an entire story. You’d think it was earth-shattering news with all the hoopla today. [Press Releases Galore]

How many people has Mitt Romney fired? Fifteen billion? Something like that? Let’s just pray he doesn’t get eated (intentional spelling) by that mob guy in New Jersey. [Wonkette]

Maybe Republicrats are realizing Jon Huntsman is the least nutty of all candidates currently running for pretzeldent. [HuffPo]

Even Former President Bill Clinton thinks Occupy Wall Street needs to simplify its messaging. And the folks in Louisville should take note. [The 'Ville Voice]

Meanwhile, that city’s Metro Sewer District scandal is raging out of control and there is apparently no real accountability. Just a bunch of smoke blowing. [Page One]

Looks like copper thieves may be responsible for the latest home explosion in Kentucky. This is why the Commonwealth can’t have nice things. [WKYT]

Woah, Cecil New admitted to drowning four-year-old Cesar Ivan Aguilar Cano. This nightmarish story has haunted Louisville for several years. [FOX41]

Instant racing revenue in Kentucky continues to climb. Up a whopping 17% in the month of December. [H-L]

Americans drastically overestimate how many unauthorized immigrants are in the United States and they don’t want to know the truth. [Slate]

“Gategood Galbraith missed some chances” is how A Kentucky Newspaper decided to weirdly headline Joe Gerth’s column about Galbraith’s death. [C-J/AKN]

What? Yet another way to evolve? Yet another way to piss off the Ark Parkers? [The Economist]

Papaw Beshear wisely rejected the University of Louisville Hospital merger request. Again. [WHAS11]

Here’s the question the paper asked in its latest unscientific poll: State House Speaker Greg Stumbo said recently that he considers the ethics case against Rep. W. Keith Hall to be “closed.” Do you believe the legislature should still take action against Hall?

As of 7:00 A.M. this morning, these were the results:

Interesting.

No wonder a large bi-partisan group of legislators is meeting without Greg Stumbo to take action.

Who you gonna believe? Nancy Pelosi’s staff or her actual daughter? Our money is on her daughter. [Politico]

The teabaggers lost their payroll tax fight and they don’t seem to be taking it too well. [The Economist]

John David Dyche may be completely clueless when it comes to government in Louisville but he has a good grasp when it comes to Steve Beshear. [C-J/AKN]

Alison Lundergan Grimes appointed some people today and we’re supposed to mention them or whatever. Unfortunately, her office hasn’t learned to stop sending out ancient press releases as attachments. [Press Releases]

As if A Kentucky Newspaper’s mind-blowing white wash of Greg Fischer’s first year of government history wasn’t bizarre enough, the Louisville Metro Animal Services nightmare has decided to rage on into 2012. More of the same. Hot mess. Flustercuck. You name it. [The 'Ville Voice]

Let’s not pretend anyone threatening to a kill an elected official isn’t batshit crazy. Kerri Richardson should have sacked up and offered comment like, “That motherfucker is crazy. Come on. The guy needs to learn the English language before threatening the governor. Stop asking stupid questions.” [WLEX18]

Louisville’s St. Stephen Baptist Church will take Anne Northup’s 30 pieces of silver to pay this guy off in 3, 2… [WFPL]

America’s water and sewer systems are so screwed up that they’re going to kill us all, forever, with the poverty. [WaPo]

66% of Americans cannot even guess the approximate population of the United States of America. We’re all mouth-breathing gasbags. [Wonkette]

You a map nerd? You like fancy things? You should probably read this story about a fancy new map. Northern Kentucky makes an appearance. [Slate]

NDAA, What Would Brett Guthrie Do? Follow the Constitution, Ignore it For Political Gain or maybe he didn’t understand what he read? [FMIKY]

It is shocking to learn that Michele Bachmann had children with Marcus Bachmann. Shocking. It’s easier to believe that Jake and Holly Harris Vonalsdnfkljztrttttt brought a child into this world, which obviously happened. [HuffPo]