I Wouldn't Let That Many Lesbians On My Porch

While teabaggers like grown-up baby David Adams and his intellectually lacking former stripper pals are making shit up about “Obamacare,” some folks are fact checking the ads attacking health care reform. [HuffPo]

Speaking of Mica, I think I just found a new business opportunity for her. [Wonkette]

People don’t REALLY let that many lesbians congregate on porches. Do they? [LEO Weekly]

Barack Obama and everyone sane opposes the Bush tax cuts, like Jack used to. But the Kentucky Democratic Party and Jack Conway are super-keen on loving them these days. [NY Times]

A Democratic pollster says Kentucky’s U.S. Senate race is much closer than every other poll ever taken. [WaPo]

You mean that alleged Republican operative on Daily Kos is actually a Democrat posing as a Republican? Or not? Who cares? This happens 24/7 on this very website and all others. [Politico]

Jennifer Moore’s the new legal counsel for the Kentucky Democratic Party. Oh, the memories. [Bluegrass Politics]

The Marion County pill buffet? It mysteriously shut its doors. How fancy. [MCL]

Oh, wait, ladies! We have some breaking important news from Miss Val, on the email press release: Lt. Dan will speak at “a military ceremony honoring our military” tomorrow. 6:00 P.M. Kingsway ASSembly of God Church in Versailles. Very important, I know. He’s also touring a recycling center in Debord tomorrow. [Press Release]

Kentucky has apparently moved from “leans Republican” to “solid Republican” on the U.S. Senate front. [Rasmussen]

What? A poll that says Jack Conway and Rand Paul are tied at 46%? [CNN/TIME]

Mongiardo Leaving His Hidey Hole In Frankfort

The latest SurveyUSA data indicate that John Yarmuth leads Republican opponent Todd Lally 47 to 45. Maybe some day the Kentucky Democratic Party will wake up? Not holding my breath. [The ‘Ville Voice]

An internal poll shows David Williams and Richie Farmer lead Steve Beshear and Jerry Abramson 48 to 44. [Williams-Mustache]

Oh, wait, Ryan Alessi says Beshear has a 7-point lead. [CN|2]

Louisville Metro Councilwoman Tina Ward-Pugh is standing against unnecessary taxation. She sponsored an anti-tolling ordinance that has other Democrats sweating in their daisy dukes. [FatLIp]

The World Equestrian Games are suffering financially. But some folks are still trying to spin this as a positive. [H-L & Jonathan Miller]

Earlier this morning I told you the story of Jim Newberry making shiz up in order to attack innocent bystanders. [Page One]

But the mess gets deeper. Seems Newberry’s own brother accepted funds from the Brown Family. [B&P]

An oil painting by James Henry Beard of Kentucky Senator Henry Clay is one of Antique’s Roadshow’s five most valuable finds. [Daily Finance]

Here’s another look at the David Williams – Richie Farmer ticket for CNHI. [Ronnie Ellis]

Are you military? Maybe just overseas pretending to be a foreigner? Your absentee ballot can now be sent via email. [Press Release]

Judge Shepherd denied the request to stop state furloughs, saying his pal Steve Beshear has the right to push them. [Bluegrass Politics]

Whaaaat? Kentucky’s public bus system is leaving people behind? Surely not! [LEO Weekly]

There’s a serious enthusiasm gap in Kentucky’s U.S. Senate race. [WaPo]

Lt. Dan will present the Governor’s Cup to the winner of the University of Kentucky – University of Louisville football game on Saturday. [Press Release]

Get Your Butt To The State Fair This Weekend

What’s that sound? I hear this is unofficially being called Non-Merit Layoff Day in Frankfort. Can’t confirm any numbers (200 saving $5 million?), but quite a few non-merit employees were axed today. So many, in fact, that some didn’t even bother showing up for work. Anyone have details? [Frankfort Rumor Mill]

Kentucky Retirement Systems is reopening the middlemen investigation. Imagine that. No wonder Olt was so pissy with me. [Paid-Only Article]

You’re kidding me, right? Rand Paul versus Librul Comedian Marty Cockring? If Rand Paul returns a campaign contribution from someone just because they run a pornography website, then he’s as dumb as I thought he was. Seriously. Who care that they run a porn site? I mean, who DOESN’T run a porn site? Marty is probably shame jacking it to that website right now. Jesus.  Oh, Rand, if porn is only degrading to women…  what about the men?  Gays?  Trannies?  HELLO? [AP via Bluegrass Politics]

Joel Pett surely caused thousands of incidences of urine loss with this cartoon about, uh, YOU NEED TO SEE IT. [CLICK HERE NOW]

Why on earth did Ron Paul need a limo? It’s being turned into the world’s largest limo or something. Wonder if Daddy Ron ever let Rand ride in it? [Gizmodo]

You know what’s interesting about Rand Paul? He continues to lie about Jack Conway. He says Jack supports cap and trade and wants to let the Bush tax cuts expire. Apparently, Rand doesn’t even know what is own campaign talking points are these days. Because they’re the folks hurriedly pointing out that Conway has decided that he: doesn’t support cap and trade and is suddenly (again) in support of extending the Bush tax cuts for up to ten years. [B&P]

Woopsiedaisy, Jim Newberry’s crew has changed its mind and release the law commissioner’s records request. A little thing called the law forced them to wake up, maybe? [H-L]

A Kentuckian from the western region of the state has been elected co-chair of the national Equality Federation. In related news, Steve Beshear is still afraid to say the word “gay.” [Murray State News]

This is the only thing worse than that damn doughnut burger. [TPFD]

Please stop being fat and letting your kids weigh more than you. Get your front butt to the Science Center and get moving. [The ‘Ville Voice]

Dear Kentucky Democratic Party: The Kentucky State Fair started yesterday – not today. [Twitter]

The DSCC is only spending $1.3 million on ad buys in Kentucky for Jack Conway. [Hotline On Call]

Don’t miss Comment on Kentucky tonight at 8:00 P.M. Eastern on KET. Scheduled guests: Jack Brammer, Ronnie Ellis, Tom Loftus. [Press Release]

Where do Kentucky’s U.S. Senate candidates stand on Iraq? [MCL]

Do You Take Your Tea With Cream Or Sugar?

We’re in the midst of the Second Annual Golden Poo Awards and your nominations are needed! Jump into the golden mix of hilarity! [Page One]

Kentucky’s got a new gubernatorial slate from the teabaggers: Phil Moffett & Mike Harmon. Harmon skipped the recent special legislative session vote on expanded gambling BUT TOOK THE PAY ANYWAY. I’m sure the tea partiers will love that. [Moffett-Harmon]

Yesterday, the U.S. House approved Rep. John Yarmuth’s $534,000 funding request for the Kentucky Air National Guard’s emergency response unit. The funds will be used to build a new facility in Louisville that will house the Contingency Response Group. [Press Release]

You know what’s crazy? Jack Conway STILL hasn’t returned Charlie Rangel’s corrupt money. [HuffPo]

Today U.S. Senate candidate Jack Conway hit back at allowing BP to rip the American taxpayer off: “It is unconscionable that after years of reaping the benefits of massive subsidies from taxpayers – especially during its years of record profits of tens of billions of dollars – BP would now throw taxpayers under the bus by shifting the burden of cleanup costs. A company that has made so much profit on the backs of American consumers and from the wallets of Kentucky motorists owes us a fair shake, especially as people throughout this state struggle to pay their own tax bills and afford basic necessities of life.” [Press Release]

David Adams has an ego bigger than mine. And it developed because he believes he’s responsible for Rand Paul’s popularity. Pee alert. [Hahaha]

Sure, we’ve had our disagreements. But this is why I like Joe Arnold a great deal. Check it out and prepare to laugh. [The ‘Ville Voice]

Seriously, Jack Conway, it’s time for you to start paying attention. Get over your bitterness and do the right thing. The national media is preparing to come at you like a steam roller. And you’re just ignoring it. [MSNBC]

Additionally, maybe you could actually start campaigning? From Owensboro to West Liberty to Newport, I hear the same thing: Jack is nowhere to be seen. [Head – Desk]

Here’s videuhtape of Mitch McConnell speaking to the National Conference of State Legislatures on Monday, July 26. [NCSL]

Health reform legislation is getting more popular. David Adams and the teabaggers are gonna hate that news. [More MSNBC]

Anyone else think it’s weird that the church is targeting a band made up of Christians? [Click the Clicky]

Oh Snap Monday! Everyone Ignore the MTR Beast

Only one person in the media isn’t afraid to question whether or not strip mining and mountaintop removal is to blame for the disaster in Pike County. [Larry Webster]

All the national papers are all over Rand Paul because his family received USDA farm subsidies. [Washington Post]

I don’t want to harp too badly on the World Equestrian Games. But come on! Who can afford these prices? Talk about absurd. [H-L]

Ron Paul wants to pull troops from Pakistan, one of the places where al Qaeda apparently exists. Does his son, Rand Liberty Christ Paul, think we should be doing this fancy thing? We’ll probably never know the truth, because he’ll give two different answers. [WSJ]

What do you do when you’re a pole dancer and your daddy is ashamed of you? Who knows. I guess you start a business, run it into the ground, stiff your vendors and then start writing about everything you never knew/will never understand. Miss Teabagger is all upset that Mitch McConnell isn’t keen on allowing gun sales at gun shows without background checks. Meaning felons, those domestically violent, the mentally ill and terrorists can buy guns from unlicensed dealers without any hassle. That sounds good! Amen. [HAHAHA]

No to unemployment or helping the working man when he’s down, but yes to cheetahs. Oh, and Hal Rogers’ daughter runs the charity getting the dough.  [John Cheves]

Oh gosh! I think Ryan Alessi broke onto the field during an Orioles game! [YouTube]

Rand Paul flip-flops on everything, forever, no matter what it is. Even Sharron Angle. [Larry Dale Keeling]

Today, Nancy Pelosi and Mitch McConnell will spew venom all across the land, from Louisville. [WHAS11]

The Rick Pitino – Sexytime In A Restaurant Lady sexytime trial is beginning! Y’all ready? [H-L]

Rand Paul is stand-offish and assholish to everybody he meets, it seems. Snubbing folks at the Kentucky Farm Bureau was an embarrassingly bad move on his part. Also, Jack Conway’s pretending to be a Republican. Particularly re: cap & trade, which he has flip-flopped on. A staffer of Jack’s confirmed to me last year that he had to “adjust his position” in order to beat Mongiardo. Guess it’s all about out-Republicaning the Republican. [Joe Arnold]

TGIF! Somebody Ask Rand About Terrorist Monkeys

Daniel Mongiardo, Whiny Ass Titty Baby with a case of extreme gay panic, is STILL whining about Jack Conway beating his ignorant ass in May. Still. I used to think the guy had a bit of a political future left. Now I think he was dropped on his head as a child. [H-L]

Soldiers are just gonna go crazy over glistening washboard abs. That’s why Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is necessary! Just ask one of (there are several) of Kentucky’s closet case legislators in Frankfort. [The Onion]

Daniel Mongiardo is going to be abandoned left and right by more unions than the AFL-CIO and its many member organizations. The longer he acts like a WATB, the more likely he is he be ruined forever. [AFL-CIO]

Wait for it… the Taliban has TERRORIST MONKEYS. [Wonkette]

Mitch McConnell is acting like he cares about our national budget. No one believes that. Not even his pals at RPK headquarters. [Politico]

Hal Rogers is bringing home $11 million in Homeland Security funding. $8 million for planning, training and such related to disasters. $2.2 million to Louisville to build up security capabilities. [H-L]

Really, Paultards? Who is “poo pooing” this as not a big deal? You’re more gullible than I thought. Particularly the guy from Louisville with “sixteen Microsoft certifications” – haha. [Mouth Breather Masturbatorium]

Everybody is freaking out about Sarah Palin’s expenses for her political action committee. Why? There’s not even anything frivolous and she’s spent very little. [HuffPo]

CentrePointe and Jim Newberry could possibly be the biggest disasters Lexington has ever seen. [B&P]

Joe Arnold still isn’t identifying this faux anti-labor group as we have done in the past. Could it be because he’s pals with Scott Jennings? [WHAS11]

I’m not saying that’s 100% the case, but something like six weeks ago we outlined that this was a project paid for by the Workforce Fairness Institute, an organization funded by anti-union corporations like Walmart and Home Depot. It’s even been written about by Media Matters. So it’s tough not to notice that nothing in-depth has been considered by local media. Tougher yet not to notice that Arnold has treated this group as more legitimate than it is. [Page One Flashback]

Wanna know why the obesity rate is out of control in some areas of Eastern Kentucky? Look no further than the corruption of “leaders” and “officials.” It’s enough to make you sick. Even the good people are on the take in the mountains. [H-L]