A former Congressional candidate loses, leaves the state and then gets all weird.

What? That’s the case of every candidate the last few years?

Here’s Heather Ryan’s (remember her?) latest thing: being a pageant mom or something?

The “Business” is very much a family affair for Heather. A married mother of three amazing daughters, Heather is also the proud wife of Carl McNew, a professional film and television producer and director and owner of Bad Baby Productions. Her children’s birthday party company, Glamour Girls Dress Up Parties was featured on Bravo Television in 2005 and she garnered national attention when she became the first woman Democratic Nominee in Kentucky’s District One election for the U.S. House of Representatives in 2008. In addition to running a successful Talent Agency, Chidren’s Party Company and helping manage her husband’s production company, Heather hosted an Internet Radio Show called, “Loud and Liberal with Heather Ryan”. Heather’s daughters have modeled for companies such as ADT, National Geographic, and DirecTV as well as performed in independent and feature length films. A star in her own right, Heather and two of her clients, Eden and Mickie Wood, star in the Unscripted Television Show, “Eden’s World” on LOGO TV. Tune in Monday nights at 10/9c to see Heather at work!

Mmm hmm. She’s on some reality show about moms who tart their babies up and push them around to make money off of them:

You’ll want to see the rest of this hot mess – including videos – after the jump…

Here are some of the videos:

Yep, that’s that little girl the entirety of the country references when they think of children being exploited.

What, you want her to make you a star? You can apply to have her “manage” you by paying her a $25 fee. Or you can pay her to open a “franchise” of her talent agency.

We learned about her latest… thing… when she sent out some email blast to her former campaign email list informing everybody that they can buy her latest single on iTunes – further profiting from the exploitation of children.

You know we love us a hot mess. So. You’re welcome!

Now people are freaking out over Greg Stumbo’s desire to move Owensboro from the 2nd U.S. Congressional District to the 1st.

Todd P’Pool raised significant cash in Owensboro and would have a high primary turnout due in part to a mayoral race next spring.

Could a P’Pool candidacy have the potential to wipe Floridian Ed Whitfield off the map?

That’s the hot gossip.

Gross Sexytime Herman Cain’s campaign manager requested that train wreck of an interview. We are forever grateful for the hilarity. [HuffPo]

It’s a solid move by Adam Edelen to consider a massive educational audit. It’ll need to be conducted with Joe Meyer out of the picture, though. [Ryan Alessi]

This Brooks Wicker guy trying to run against John Yarmuth again needs to give up before he gets going. [Failing For 2nd Time]

Chuck Geveden – the old one – is retiring from the Justice Cabinet at the end of the year. [C-J/AKN]

Mouth-breathing Republicans want your public school children to remain dumb and fat. We’re talking Jim Gooch clones, here, folks. Once again trying to kill school lunch standards. [Wonkette]

Lexington finally realized Central Kentuckians can’t figure out how one-way streets work. [H-L]

Of course Brett Guthrie opposes the plan to move Owensboro into the 1st Congressional District. People are freaking the eff out over it. [Joe Gerth]

Don’t act surprised that Greg Stumbo is still going on and on about how we need to waste taxpayer dollars on a special legislative session to handle redistricting. Frankfort knew this was an issue and ignored it for way too long. [WLEX18]

According to a new report, the Federal Housing Administration may require a taxpayer bailout by the end of next year. [HuffPo]

Republicans are hinting at flexibility on taxes to reach a budget deal. Is it a false dawn? [The Economist]

How crazy is the Frankfort rumor mill this week? The Beshear crew is apparently losing its mine over the Alison Lundergan Grimes victory. Alison is apparently still completely clueless about what’s going on and her campaign staff confirm such. Many seem to think she’s set to have her ass handed to her once she gets into office. [Page One]

If you’re a veteran in need of a job in the Louisville area, 30+ employers hiring more than 500 people will be at John Yarmuth’s jobs fair on the 21st. [Click the Clicky]

How hilarious is it that Steve Beshear’s campaign went crazy and got Judge Wingate to issue a restraining order against Restoring America? Because the group “may” have violated state campaign finance laws. Never mind that the group isn’t in Kentucky and did, legally, disclose its sole donor. [H-L]

The teen that stole those flags is set to face charges. If he merely beat a gay kid, though, he wouldn’t face anything. Woo Kentucky. [WLEX18]

Premature much? Both Floridian Ed Whitfield and Hal Rogers endorsed Mitt Romney the mormon cultist for pretzeldent. [Jim Carroll]

Tomorrow Jack Conway will speak to students at B. Michael Caudill Middle School in Richmond about the devastating consequences of prescription drug abuse. [Scary Press Release]

A trillion here, $500 billion there. Talk about huge shortfalls in public pension plans. [The Economist]

Steve Beshear says there was no effort to force state employees to contribute to his campaign. Despite, of course, countless state employees proving otherwise. [Bluegrass Politics]

Herman Cain just wants to cold fry all the illegal immigrants to death. [Wonkette]

Whaaat? Out of the top 100 public plans, the Kentucky Teachers fund had the lowest ten year return in the nation? You don’t say! [Click the Clicky]

Do you need to pee? Is your day rotting your brain? Go watch this video of Herman Cain singing “There’s No Pizza!” [HuffPo]

This may be some major Steve Beshear déjà vu. Today he announced that Hitachi Automotive Systems will create a hybrid electric battery plant in Harrodsburg. Beshear’s office says the project will create 60 new jobs. You want us to predict how this one will turn out? [Press Release]

Papaw Beshear will have a meltdown ASAP. The federal gubmint predicts a decline in coal-generated electricity in 2011 and 2012. [WFPL]

Remember when Paul Patton said this about Ron McCloud? “We don’t know that that’s illegal, but it is inappropriate for a secretary of our cabinet to do that.” ??? Yeah. He was forced to resign. Steve Beshear is spending countless hours saying the opposite and apologizing for his taxpayer-funded staffers who have done the same thing. Don’t hold your breath waiting for them to resign. [Flashback]

Should the United States Congress really get so much vacation time? Of course not. [WaPo]

Can you imagine the governor of Kentucky doing something as solid and honest as the governor of New York? [The Advocate]

The DCCC just doesn’t care for Andy Barr and is running radio ads against him throughout the district. [Ryan Alessi]

Oh, wait, the NRCC is hitting Ben Chandler over the “balanced budget” amendment with robocalls. [The Hill]

Floridian Ed Whitfield stopped on the side of the road to rescue a stray dog. Rather than keep the dog, he took it to a local shelter and gave them a $1,000 check. This may be the only good thing Whitfield has ever done in or for Kentucky. [H-L]

Do you want to read a story about Richie Farmer that is so long it should be illegal? [The Post Game]

According to the latest polling, John Boehner’s disapproval rating is spiking in the wake of the nasty debt deal. [Daily Kos]

What does the S&P downgrade mean if France is rated higher than the United States? [Pro Publica]

President Barack Obama DID inherit these economic problems. Problems caused by people like George W. Bush and Mitch McConnell. [Reuters]

Standard & Poor’s is right. It is the U.S. Congress’ fault. Take a look at the politics of sovereign debt ratings downgrades. [Slate]

The United States is unlikely to regain its AAA rating any time soon, according to the S&P. Rest of the world is taking notice. [BBC]

Oh, wait, the U.S. Senate Banking Committee is gathering information for a possible S&P hearing. Can’t be having them force responsibility on Congress or anything. [Politico]

Comparing poor people to scavenging raccoons in a political speech? Sounds like something a grifter teabagger in Kentucky would do. [TPM]

Greg Stumbo, Keith Hall and Leslie Combs are together making sure they get press by giving their legislative pay to a chamber of commerce. [Daily Journal]

Floridian Ed Whitfield filed a bill to ban raceday drugs in horsies. [H-L]

Uh, tension much? As questions mounted over how bin Laden hid in Pakistan, U.S. officials sought to avoid a break in relations. [NY Times]

The U.S. Dollar sank to a three-year low as the United States rate view weights. [Reuters]

Barack Obama, Osama bin Laden and the foreign policy stature gap. [WaPo]

Thank goodness the USDA is going to audit the national school lunch program to find out how much cash various companies are cheating from school systems. [The Hill]

Senator Harry Reid was injured by a car that wasn’t moving. I repeat, Harry Read was injured by a stationary car. [Wonkette]

Asthma rates are on the rise in the United States but no one really knows why. [HuffPo]

The United Nations says there will be 10.1 billion people by the end of the century. [NY Times]

Apparently, little learning takes place at alternative learning centers. They’re just suspension dumping grounds. [The Investigative Fund]

Rising gas prices are shifting the energy debate because everybody is freaking out. Can’t wait for fuel shortages. Maybe then people will walk more and drive less. [WaPo]

Do you live near a food desert? The USDA has a food desert locator and you should check it out. It’s a little wonky, but useful. [USDA]

The federal government really is saving money by selling off excess property. Maybe that’s something we should do on the state and local levels, as well? [White House]

Poor Bobbie Coleslaw skipped a Republican campaign event in Northern Kentucky to attend a fundraiser in Washington, D.C. It’s super-sad that she believes either of those two events will matter for her in the long run. [H-L]

Lobbyists are raising unlimited and undisclosed contributions to buy a supreme court seat. And the mouth-breathers still have the nerve to suggest this is an issue of free speech. [Alternet]

Mitch McConnell can’t help but be controlled by King Coal. Every other word he’s said lately is about how much of a devil the EPA is. Must be a big fundraiser coming up for him or some such. [H-L]

Kentucky’s gubernatorial race has turned into the second-most important in the country. Guess that’s what happens with the DGA starts talking it up and internal polling starts showing Beshear at risk of losing his seat. [Politico]

New home sales have taken a nose dive to the lowest level in nearly 50 years. But don’t worry, your politicians will tell you everything that it’s all puppies and rainbows. [Consumerist]

The Energy Tax Prevention Act? Really, Floridian Ed Whitfield? Let’s talk about comprehensive tax reform instead of aiding and abetting your special interest friends. [The Hill]

Steve Beshear really is wrong. Democrats are just afraid to criticize him because they’re afraid of David Williams. Partisanship wins the day. Again. [KY Club for Growth]

Rand Paul says “Obamacare” is dangerous. But he’s yet to offer any alternative that isn’t a bunch of hype spread on thick with faux savey changey bullshiz. Because he has no clue what the heck he’s doing on the health care front and isn’t getting traction elsewhere. [Roll Call]

Massey coal mines have been hit with a whopping 80 citations for safety violations. Meanwhile, the Kentucky Coal Association and its bloated pals like Jim Gooch continue to kill our Commonwealth with mountaintop removal. [HuffPo]

Earlier today, State House Republican Floor Leader Jeff Hoover called on House Speaker Greg Stumbo to bring legislators back to Frankfort on April 6 to override Governor Steve Beshear’s vetoes. [Press Release]

Legislative pay is in limbo for a special legislative session that lacks State Representatives. We’re just gonna keep flushing money down the toilet because that’s what we do in Kentucky. [Bluegrass Politics]

Gross person Newt Gingrich says his affair clarified why he needed to impeach President Bill Clinton. The blob’s hypocrisy is ripe. [Wonkette]

You get “Democratic” congressional nominees like Charles Hatchett that to run against Floridian Ed Whitfield.

And you wonder why there’s such an overwhelming bout of ignorance sweeping this state.

Seriously – you should watch the entire clip. Hatchett discusses his encounter with a Jordanian “Muslim” – because all the Muslims own gas stations. And then his bit about nanotechnology.

Be sure to watch the entire hour-long program at Kentucky Tonight.

Other prominent Kentucky Republicans gave speeches, as well, so let’s take a look at what they had to say…

U.S. Rep. Brett Guthrie:

U.S. Rep. Hal Rogers:

Peep speeches by Ed Whitfield & Mike Duncan after the jump…

U.S. Rep. Ed Whitfield:

Former RNC Chairman Mike Duncan:

Young Democrats of America will host the 2011 convention in Louisville. Big news for the Kentucky Young Democrats. [The 'Ville Voice]

Republicrat Ben Chandler is all over the New York Times over coal and the EPA. [NYTimes]

What is it with teabaggers and racism? Hoo boy. [HuffPo]

Geoff Davis’ communications director, Alexandra Haynes, is moving on from her job. According to an email blast today, she’s starting a new position as communications director for the House Small Business Committee Republicans in Washington next week. Davis chief of staff, Armstrong Robinson, is taking over all media relations. [Press Release]

It’s bad news bears when the Cabinet for Health and Family Services works to keep child abuse deaths secret. Kentucky fails again. [H-L]

A judge has refused to halt elections for the Kentucky Retirement System. And can anybody tell me why on earth Bill Ryan is running for the KRS board? He’s a Democratic Party guy, not a longtime state employee. [State-Journal]

ALERT! Ed Whitfield was actually spotted INSIDE Kentucky’s borders and not in Florida. Repeat, Ed Whitfield was seen in Kentucky. [Murray Ledger & Times]

That Mubarack Nobama is so mean to poor Mitchellsue Redchina McConnell. He should be deported for hating America and being unfair! Goodness. [Politico]

Crazy people always run for mayor, no matter what Kentucky city you’re in. [Tom Eblen]

Hello, total weirdness. Governor & First Lady Beshear hosted a press conference earlier this afternoon with Magic Johnson to discuss Graduate Kentucky. [Press Release]