Laawwwwwwwd. You need to look at this fake picture of Michele and Marcus Bachmann and then read this hot mess of a story. You will pee all over yourself. [The Bilerico Project]

Did McCreary County buck a “Democrat” trend or a DemocratIC trend? You’d think a news editor would know. [McCreary County Record]

Mitch McConnell loves lately to pretend that he is bipartisan. You know that couldn’t be further from reality. [Politico]

Casey, Breathitt, Todd, Daviess, Livingston and Garrard Counties were selected to be audited for voting irregularities by Jack Conway’s office. [Press Release]

If California can stumble toward a solution to its public pension problem, why can’t Kentucky? Oh, right. Frankfort. [The Economist]

If racist halfwits ate anything other than corn syrup and pig anus, they’d be worried about their fear stifling the farming industry. [MSNBC]

Another day, another death at an Eastern Kentucky coal mine. But those regulations are so scary, right? [C-J/AKN]

The air is finally coming out of Sexytime Herman Cain’s sexytime crazy balloon. It’s a sad day for comedy in America. [Reuters]

The best part about living in the United States is that whole, you know… oh, right again. That whole bit about this apparently being a police state. Because a bunch of hippies are such a threat. [Wonkette]

Your U.S. Congress is still trying to choke the Government Accountability Office. Starving its own budget-saving watchdog seems the norm, though. [HuffPo]

Woah, who let Peppy Martin loose to drive around Lexington in the early morning hours!? [WLEX18]

People are really freaking out in Frankfort this week. Pointing out that rumors are just rumors doesn’t even seem to phase the Beshear crew. [Page One]

Candidates like Michele Bachmann and Sexytime Herman Cain are such hot messes even the most creepy mouth-breathers are freaked out. [NY Times]

With the House voting to give states control over coal ash, Kentucky is truly and royally fucked. Hardcore fucked. [WKYT]

Here’s part of the reason why. Steve Beshear’s concerns for King Coal are sorely misplaced. [H-L]

Matthew Barzun is once again making it rain for President Barack Obama. This time for his re-election campaign. [ABC News]

What do you expect to happen during tonight’s KET forum with Jack Conway and Todd P’Pool? We expect P’Pool to foam at the mouth about Obama, because Todd still doesn’t realize we already know he’s afraid of a black man more important than him. But we also expect Todd – if he’s decided to sack up and bother being honest – to press Jack on several issues he’ll refuse to talk about. Should be highly entertaining. [Deep KET Thoughts]

This is what we mean by mainstream media failures. The headline: Beshear Administration allegedly receives large amount of money from state workers. Allegedly? The story itself is almost as bad. [WHAS11]

The University of Louisville Hospital merger mess is getting dirtier and dirtier. But with the tens of thousands of dollars Steve Beshear raked in from those who stand to gain from said merger, nothing is likely to slow it down. [C-J/AKN]

Brave patriot turd frother Rick Santorum warns America about dangerous single mother voters. [Wonkette]

Turns out a 14-year-old swiped those three flags from the Healing Field Memorial in Lawrenceburg. [WLEX18]

David Axelrod says Republican candidates don’t understand the anger behind Occupy Wall Street. Maybe it’s because they’re incapable? Meemaw n poppop are also having a tough time figuring things out. [HuffPo]

Marching for jobs and economic justice in the name of Martin Luther King Jr. makes way more sense to most people, though. [NPR]

Could this be the guy who finally saves the United States Postal Service? [WaPo]

Of course crazy ass Herman Cain is going to stumble on taxes and immigration. He comprehends neither. [NY Times]

We’re surprised Kentucky Democrats haven’t sought this horrible racist out for his thoughts on immigration. [Wonkette]

Seems like there’s never any hope in Eastern Kentucky. Now small towns can’t afford to pay their power bills. [H-L]

Will Jim King and the rest of Louisville’s Metro Council ever sack up and do the responsible thing with Metro Animal Services? Greg Fischer clearly isn’t capable. [The 'Ville Voice]

Really? Jobless claims UNEXPECTEDLY rose? What planet are you living on if you were surprised by a rise? [HuffPo]

David Jones is putting his money where his mouth is and he’s offering $10 million of his own cash to build an East End Bridge in Louisville. [C-J/AKN]

Now the United States Postal Service wants to close 250 mail processing facilities. Closing all these facilities in Kentucky is crazy! [WKY]

John Boehner’s ideas for tax reform are no doubt insane. But no one can deny that comprehensive tax reform is needed. [Politico]

President Barack Obama has decided to exclude Social Security from the deficits plan. [Reuters]

Mitch McConnell and Steve Beshear are both praising Kentucky’s Medal of Honor recipient. [WFPL & Press Releases]

Adam Edelen is talking about pension reform. Just like David Williams. Can you believe that? [Ryan Alessi]

OH MY GOD! THEY’RE TRYING TO GET US THROUGH THE CANTALOUPE SUPPLY! And you know we buy like 50% of all cantaloupe that is sold in Kentucky. [ABC News]

This is the 114th day Republican Party of Kentucky Chairman Steve Robertson questioned Jack Conway: “Voters in this state are sick of politicians who simply refuse to answer important questions,” said Robertson. “Jack Conway is going to be in for a rude awakening on November 8th when the voters finally get their chance to retire him for good.” [Press Release]

The aliens are all coming to get you. Are you packed? Ready to take a trip? [HuffPo]

Really, who the flip cares about public prayer? It’s ridiculous. Get over it. If you wanna pray? Do it where you’re not using my tax dollars – like at public school athletic events. The fact that anybody would politicize this is absurd. This is just as dumb as the Ark Park. Clutch those pearls! [AP]

As the United States pushes immigrants away, the East snatches them up. Putting ourselves at a competitive disadvantage. [The Economist]

David Williams offered an educational alternative. The Democrats ran from it, essentially, and offered no other ideas. [CN|2]

The economy only grew one percent this spring and that means we’re all gonna die of the poverty again. [WaPo]

John Yarmuth is none too happy with Barack Obama on the jobs front and he is making sure everybody hears about it. [The Hill]

Crazy old John McCain and some other poop leaches tried to give Qadhafi/Gaddafi all kinds of arms. [Politico]

People are literally freaking out over the labor board’s new poster rule. [HuffPo]

Water balloon fighting can be fun. But can you imagine the amount of time, energy, effort and resources wasted on this? [H-L]

There are all kinds of new numbers and geography for the gays. They are coming to recruit your children. [NY Times]

Taking a page out of the Carter County playbook. An Ohio Congresscritter had police seize cameras at a town hall meeting. [Poynter]

If Little Todd Hollenbach’s financial literacy program had worked, do you think John Calipari would be launching a joint effort with some banks in order to teach kids financial literacy? [H-L]

The U.S. Postal Service wants to cut 120,000 jobs and pull out of federal benefits plans. Let’s see how long it takes half that workforce to, uh, go postal. [HuffPo]

There are some crazy things going down in Richmond these days. It’s gotta be something in the water in Central Kentucky. [Richmond Register]

What was that, again, about religious hospital systems being a-okay safe? We have a system right here in Kentucky that cheated the government out of $9 million. [C-J/AKN]

Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) raided a Mexican restaurant in Harlan. So you know meemaw and poppop are going to be even more askeerd of the foreigns. [WYMT]

Here’s a weird story about Bruce Lunsford living in a condo in Saratoga during the summer. [The Business Review]

Just in case you were wondering why Perry Clark has gone full-on teabagger using the Hitler-Obama bits lately? It’s rampant with all the teabaggers and the Rascal crowd. [Wonkette]

Remember that psych job pastor who wanted to burn the Koran? He’s planning a 9/11 Ground Zero visit. [HuffPo]

Remember when everybody freaked out over criticism of Kentucky Farm Bureau? Remember when that organization admitted to discriminating against people who didn’t hate the gays enough? Here’s Farm Bureau receiving and doling out tons of government cash. [Ashland Independent]

Want to win copies of The Kentucky Bourbon Cookbook and The Kentucky Bourbon Cocktail Book? I’ve got ten copies of each to give away. [The 'Ville Voice]

Smokers are apparently avoiding the cancer stick tax by using self-rolled cigarettes and buying small cigars. [H-L]

Dewayne Bunch, a legislator injured breaking up a school fight, is continuing to recover. [WLEX18]

The editorial board is on the money about David Williams’ crazy ass proposal for Jefferson County Public Schools. But Sheldon Berman and the JCTA? Give us a goddamn break. There’s a reason Berman got kicked to the curb. That man took JCPS to the bank and the JCTA does nothing but waste mountains of cash that would be better spent on the teachers who depend on the organization. [What A Farce]

Beginning July 1, 2012, employees of Louisville Metro Government will be eligible for domestic partner benefits. It’s a shame the rest of the state doesn’t follow suit. [The 'Ville Voice]

No one is shocked that the Republican “budget” guts economic data. Naturally, they want to kill anything and everything unless it makes them money. [HuffPo]

So Gatewood Galbraith is forever going to be known as a kooky, fringe candidate. Way to go, folks, way to go. [CN|2]

If Gatewood is able to make his candidacy official on Thursday? It will likely mean a whole lot less without Ralph Long on board. [H-L]

A fisherman found a body on a log in the Cumberland River in Whitley County. [WKYT]

See? It’s not just about getting a pill or visiting an emergency room. Patients need treatment from actual people. [Reuters]

Westerners could be programmed for fatty foods and alcohol. If, by westerners, they mean everyone on earth. [BBC]

A judge says the federal government has misled the public on a controversial immigration program. [Pro Publica]

Standard & Poor’s is the second credit agency to warn the United States of a downgrade if debt talks fail. [Slate]

Gene Robinson, a Lexington native and the country’s first openly gay Episcopal bishop, says he relied on his faith to weather the storm. [H-L]

Remember that girl who got nude and draped herself in a flag? The one Rand Paul hired? She should probably enter this contest. [Wonkette]

Ben Chandler has more campaign cash in the bank than Candy Barr. He’s also probably more of a Republican. [WLEX18]

President Barack Obama is now backing means-testing for Medicare in an attempt to cut a deal for raising the debt ceiling. [HuffPo]

Rejoice!

Here it is, anyway:

Hall of Shame – April 2011 Inductees

1. Rep. Steve King (R-IA) — A man who cites the Bible in his opposition to immigration reform, King favors an electrified wire border fence, arguing “we do that with livestock all the time.” King believes that undocumented immigrants can be detected from their clothing and “the type of grooming they might have,” and labeled the DREAM Act “amnesty.” Alarmingly, King vice chairs the House Immigration Subcommittee – the first stop for every immigration bill.

2. Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX) — According to Lamar Smith, the guaranteed 14th Amendment right to birthright citizenship is a “misinterpretation,” which Smith plans to remedy with a ban on that right that can “get five votes” on the Supreme Court. Such a posture would be troubling enough from any member of Congress, but coming from the chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, it’s downright dangerous.

Peep the other eight inductees after the jump…

3. Rep. Ed Royce (R-CA) — After calling for a national version of the Arizona SB 1070, Royce has announced new legislation to give local police Arizona-style powers over immigration. An active leader in the House’s leading anti-reform caucus, Royce supports forcing hospitals to gather information on possible undocumented immigrants, and opposes increasing visas for skilled workers.

4. Rep. Peter King (R-NY) — Always a lightning rod of controversy, Peter King has been in the headlines recently for scapegoating Muslim citizens. But we should remember that King has a long history of scapegoating and marginalizing all immigrants; he fought to ban the use of Spanish by government agencies and authored a bill to ban drivers’ licenses for undocumented workers because they are “potential terrorists.” King chairs the Homeland Security Committee, which has a major role in immigration reform legislation.

5. Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) — The potential presidential candidate has a history of inflammatory statements which go along with her outlandish voting record. She’s spread the widely-debunked rumor that Phoenix is “the kidnap[ping] capital of the United States,” using that myth to justify her support for an armed presence on the border. She’s advocates Arizona SB 1070, and told Bill O’Reilly that all local law enforcement should be required to ask for proof of immigration status. Bachmann chairs the House Tea Party Caucus.

6. Rep. Brian Bilbray (R-CA) – Having built a career spreading fear about our broken border, Bilbray now helms the House’s anti-immigration reform caucus, where he’s leading the fight for an Arizona SB 1070-style bill. Discontent with mere anti-immigrant legislation, Bilbray has spread rumors that President Obama will issue amnesty by decree, and “the human smuggling, prostitution, murder and virtual enslavement of human beings” is happening because immigrants are “drawn to this nation by… taxpayer-funded jobs.”

7. Sen. John Boozman (R-AR) — While campaigning for Senate last year, Boozman wrote that “our schools, our hospitals and our jobs are being compromised by the influx of illegal immigrants.” His solution? Eliminating the Constitutional right to birthright citizenship, reducing overall legal immigration, and spreading rumors that President Obama “may grant amnesty through an Executive Order.”

8. Rep. Heath Shuler (D-NC) — In word and deed, Shuler is eager to prove that obstructionism is bipartisan. The top Democrat in Congress’s largest anti-reform caucus, he worked with Tom Tancredo to author the SAVE Act, which would deport 12 million undocumented immigrants, was backed by NumbersUSA, and would’ve taken a large step towards militarizing America’s border.

9. Rep. Candice Miller (R-MI) — One of the leading proponents of the baseless rumor that the Obama administration is behind a “backdoor amnesty” program, Candice Miller chairs the Homeland Security Border Subcommittee. She co-sponsored the deportation-only SAVE Act, and won the support of Lou Dobbs for her fear-mongering that undocumented workers will gain political power due to the 2010 Census counting “persons,” not “citizens.”

10. Rep. Ben Quayle (R-AZ) — Heralded as a “true reformer” by the notoriously anti-immigration NumbersUSA, Ben Quayle exemplified the worst political impulses when it comes to immigration, exploiting fear and misinformation to ride into office. Quayle made election promises to reduce the overall number of immigrants allowed in America, erect a Pacific-to-the-Gulf electrified fence, and send the National Guard to patrol the border. These efforts may have won him the support of Chuck Norris, but here’s a fact for Chuck Norris and Ben Quayle: your scare tactics draw out the status quo – preventing meaningful reform, breaking up families, and putting America at risk.

Ralph Long is gonna manage the campaign of Gatewood Galbraith and Dea Riley. That has to sting for Steve Beshear and the good old boy Democrats in Frankfort. Lots of Democratic votes will roll Gatewood’s way in the general, for sure. Lots. [Bluegrass Politics & Ralph Long]

A federal investigation couldn’t find a single homeowner wrongfully foreclosed upon. Our heads are about to spin. [HuffPo]

Portraits Of The Poor: Dignity In Times Of Despair. This is right up our alley. Maybe it’s right up yours. [NPR]

Ben Chandler is co-sponsoring oil price gouging legislation. Seems a little too common sense for him. What gives? [WLEX18]

If you missed it earlier today, Jonathan Miller quit his job in state government. [Page One]

A former Kentucky teacher who was fired for her past in pornographic films has been fired in St. Louis. For the same thing. Who cares? Jesus H. [H-L]

The AARP is suing the United States over effects of reverse mortgages. Guess Fred Thompson’s career as a reverse mortgage spokeshack is gonna be short-lived. [NY Times]

Three Kentuckians are prominently involved in the Yale Environmental Film Festival. [The 'Ville Voice]

A study says melting ice sheets are now the largest contributor to rising sea levels. But global warming isn’t happening, right? Just a hoax. [HuffPo]

Remember the attempted MLK bombing in Spokane? The nutbag arrested for it yesterday apparently left a trail of hate on the internet. [TPM]

Republicans love free speech when it comes to pocketing millions in campaign cash but they hate it when it comes to the internet and free flow of information. [Engadget]

See what he said on his own website on May 5, 2010:

Millions of illegals crossing our border without our knowledge constitutes a clear threat to our nation’s security. I will work to secure our borders immediately. Congress and the federal government have clearly failed at this mission. It is intellectually dishonest to want to fight terrorism, and then not do the most basic things like securing the border.

Right now, our nation is at risk. We must get serious about our border security, and I have a concrete plan to do so: My plan includes an underground electric fence, with helicopter stations to respond quickly to breaches of the border. I would include satellite and increased aerial surveillance, and a boost of funds and training to the border agents. Finally, instead of closing military bases at home and renting space in Europe, I would advocate for more strategic location and construction of some of these bases to protect our border.

What was that, again, Rand, about not saying it on video and not saying it on your campaign website? (Don’t worry – I archived the screenshot in case you decide to go scrubbing again.)

Rand Paul says we should build an underground electric border fence to keep the Mexicans out.

Republican Senatorial candidate Rand Paul wants to build a fence along the U.S.-Mexico border. It’s a rather ho-hum proposition in the larger context of conservative ideas — except that Paul wants that fence to be electric and he wants it built underground.

-SNIP-

“I have not heard that,” the Texas Republican said. “Underground? What would happen? How would that work?”

That’s actually a good question and one that Paul’s campaign won’t answer. His website says only the following: “My plans include an underground electric fence, with helicopter stations to respond quickly to breaches of the border.” The details of how it would be built, what it would take to make it work and how much it would cost are left unanswered.

Moreover, aides to the Kentucky Republican have refused repeated attempts to explain the idea to the Huffington Post. On June 14, Paul’s former spokesman and current campaign manager, Jesse Benton, said he would call the following day to provide further details. He never did.

Click here to read more.

Or watch this fancy video:

Isn’t it interesting that Rand opposes a physical border fence because it reminds him of the Berlin Wall? Disagreeing with nearly all conservatives, believing their solution is similar to the Soviet Union’s solution.