Humorous Bits from Election Day

(Not Sam) Beverage alert!

An editorial appearing in the Courier-Journal about outgoing Governor Ernie Fletcher and the Ten Commandments in the capitol rotunda has us in stitches. It is highly inappropriate on a day when we should all be reaching out with conciliatory arms. But it sure is hilarious!

“Thou shalt not bow down thyself” to graven images, one of the commandments insists, but maybe nobody on high is watching when rotunda visitors regularly come forward, rub the Great Emancipator’s shoe and expect him to grant a wish.

What better place than the state Capitol to post a reminder that “Thou shalt not steal?”

And any place is a good place to caution folks that they aren’t supposed to covet their neighbor’s ox, or his ass. A “values candidate” would know if there’s a lot of ox- and ass-coveting going on.

OMG! We can’t catch our breath from laughing!

Foaming at the Mouth Update Dept

Cheves takes Mitch to task. Sen. Mitch McConnell is taken to task by the Herald-Leader’s John Cheves for his sickening $25 million earmarks. The National Legal and Policy Center is up in arms as well. The funds, you’ll recall, are for British defense contractor BAE which is under investigation for bribery. We’re just surprised BAE isn’t red Chinese. [H-L]

Ernest Lee plays childish politics. Proof Ernie Fletcher is playing politics with the Ten Commandments. Shocked? Surprised? Didn’t think so. Only three more days. [PolWatchers]

Looking out. Attorney General Greg Stumbo’s office announced yesterday that Kentucky Bureau of Investigation agents will guard elections in the Commonwealth on November 6. Agents will act to protect voters from discrimination and will help file “Oath of Voter” documentation if a vote is challenged at the polls. [Press Release]

According to a press release, Republican candidate for state auditor Linda Greenwell will be rejoining her campaign for the final 72 hour crunch. The same press release also touts her chances– based on what’s effectively a poll of non-voting high school students. No matter where we stand ideologically, we still wish her family the best.

Non-political but equally disturbing. A Louisville goth “couple” (HAHAHA– please) are starring on this season’s Amazing Race which begins Sunday. Just go read the story and look at the pictures. Trust us. It’s worth it. [C-J]

Ernest Lee & Pat Boone: Suspicious Homophobes

What is it with Ernie Fletcher? What on earth is with his fixation of openly hating gay people as often as possible? It’s too bad we have morals or we’d out his gay campaign staffers and gay cabinet members. Surely they’re ashamed of the giant idiot this guy has proven to be.

We thought the race for governor couldn’t get any more hilarious. Til now.

Pat Boone has produced two robo calls in support of Ernest Lee. They’re paid for by the Republican Party of Kentucky, of course. Put your beverage down before proceeding. Don’t say you weren’t warned. (And make sure you don’t need to tinkle before hitting play.)

Here’s a gem from one of the calls:

“His opponent is so ultra-liberal he’s just been enthusiastically endorsed by C-FAIR, a prominent gay rights advocacy group. They’re convinced Beshear is their guy. Now you have to ask, ‘Do you really want Kentucky to become another San Francisco?’ Please re-elect Ernie Fletcher.”

The 30-second spot:

[audio:http://pageonekentucky.com/audio/pboone30.mp3]

And a longer, more hate-filled 60-second spot:

[audio:http://pageonekentucky.com/audio/pboone60.mp3]

These kooks can’t lose quickly enough with their anti-gay tripe.

Strange Behavior Daily Briefing Dept

Kentucky businesses suck. Or they’re dumb. Right? Putting super-personal records in the hands of thieves seems like the coolest thing 121 Kentucky businesses could think of doing. We love it. Thanks for screwing the folks of the Commonwealth. [H-L]

Not surprising. The White House is withholding hundreds of Abramoff documents from the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform. Could Geoff Davis be mentioned in those hundreds of pages? We hear that’s a distinct possibility. [Gubmint]

Still gunning for McConnell. Schumer has his sights set on Mitch. [TPM]

Nationals taking notice. A Rarity: All Major Newspapers in Kentucky Back Democrat for Governor. No one endorses poor Ernest Lee. [Editor & Publisher]

Beverage alert. The male Principal of Bethlehem (Catholic) High School in Bardstown was cited on prostitution charges in Louisville’s West End. You read it right. Prostitution. The catch? He was dressed as a woman wearing black leather, fishnet stockings and faux breasts. Life doesn’t get any better than this, folks. [WAVE3, C-J]

Trick-or-Treating with Ernest Lee!

Have children? Oh man. Put on your Lary Craig mask and drive as quickly as you can to Frankfort. Glenna’s giving out candy at the governor’s mansion.

From the New York Times:

“We always get about 1,200 trick-or-treaters at the governor’s mansion; this year we are giving them gummy finger puppets, gum-ball eyeballs, candy corn and SweeTarts. And the cabinet secretaries all come and run their own trick-or-treat booths on the lawn.”

Glenna Fletcher, first lady of Kentucky

Okay. Candy corn and SweeTarts? Come on! That’s the best we can do?

Hate to be partisan here, but… Steve & Jane will be giving out much better candy at the mansion next year. When it comes to kids on Halloween– shock & awe is the way to go.

H/T Consuming Louisville. Thanks!