Not all Kentucky State Police officers are like this guy. Not all officers try to get a little sexytime in exchange for not making an arrest. [H-L]

This Winchester man did such a great thing that he became a hot topic throughout the national media yesterday. [HuffPo]

Clarence Aaron seemed to be especially deserving of a federal commutation, an immediate release from prison granted by the president of the United States. At 24, he was sentenced to three life terms for his role in a cocaine deal, even though it was his first criminal offense and he was not the buyer, seller or supplier of the drugs. [ProPublica]

Here comes Ben Chandler trying to pretend he’s responsible for keeping the USPS facility in Lexington open. [WKYT]

U.S. crime statistics show illegal drugs play a central role in criminal acts, providing new evidence that tackling drugs as a public health issue could offer a powerful tool for lowering national crime rates, officials said on Thursday. [Reuters]

If you missed it? Almost everybody is getting killed in Louisville these days. You can’t do anything without getting shot. It’s almost like being in Lexington. [C-J/AKN]

Almost nobody is going to go vote on Tuesday. All those television advertising dollars? Completely wasted. [H-L]

Okay, this latest thing from Chuck Schumer seems a bit ridiculous. If these douchebags want to renounce their citizenship, why not just go ahead and push them out forever? [Wonkette]

Only in Kentucky. A condemned killer’s fight to receive surgery for agonizing hip pain pushed Kentucky officials into an uncomfortable debate over security, politics and even the possibility of inviting scorn from Fox News pundits. [WLEX18]

Did you know that President Barack Obama is a scary dictator monster because he wants women to be able to decide whether or not they do things with their bodies? [Wonkette]

Yep, the House voted to continue the war with Afghanistan. Which may be a bigger blunder than Iraq. But that’s the American way. [HuffPo]

What was that, again, about us being the only folks to criticize Rand Paul, mouth-breathers? [C-J/AKN]

Didn’t take long for CoventryCares to resume coverage of that addiction drug. [Business First]

Whaaaaat? An undercover gay bathhouse spy was endorsed by Michele Beard Bachmann? Nope, it’s not her husband! This is getting more and more interesting. [Wonkette]

This story about Morehead State will literally make you pee your pants while laughing. [H-L]

Here’s a nice look at how Louisvillians will be screwed by the Louisville Water Company and Metro Sewer District. BEND OVER AND GRAB YOUR ANKLES! [C-J/AKN]

Really, you can’t even sit at home in Lexington without having your home invaded these days. [WKYT]

In Pennsylvania, there’s an industrial revolution going on. Battalions of drilling rigs are boring into the earth to extract natural gas from an underground layer of shale called the Marcellus formation. And as the wells multiply all along the western end of the state, people worry they may be facing another toxic legacy. [NPR]

On April 8th Envisat, Europe’s largest Earth-observing satellite, unexpectedly stopped talking to its users on the Earth below. Since then those users have been frantically trying to re-establish contact. [The Economist]

The House GOP leadership is moving swiftly to try to change the Violence Against Women Act to earn support from outside groups and gain passage on the floor. [Politico]

Doesn’t look like President Barack Obama’s decision to say he doesn’t hate the gays had much of an impact on polling. [Daily Kos]

The agreement over voting on amendments to the Export-Import Bank reauthorization legislation is a good example of how bills will make their way through the Senate, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell said Tuesday. [The Hill]

Is Thomas Massie a big time jobs creator? Not so much. And he’s following directly in Rand Paul’s hypocritical footsteps. [Page One Here & Here]

But he’s been having fun in Warshington lately:

Here’s a damning story about the Ohio River Bridges Debacle in Louisville that you will never see in A Kentucky Newspaper. [News & Tribune]

Handing open-government advocates a partial victory in a better than decade-long battle, the Federal Communications Commission voted Friday to require major network affiliates in the top 50 TV markets to post information about their political ads online. [Sunlight Foundation]

Don’t miss Comment on Kentucky tonight at 8:00 P.M. Eastern on KET. Scheduled gusts: Ryan Alessi, Joe Gerth, Greg Stotelmyer. [KET]

A Senate investigation reveals that there is little evidence that torture produced anti-terror breakthroughs. [HuffPo]

Here’s your chance to win a copy of The Kentucky Derby. It’s all about the Run for the Roses becoming America’s premier sporting event. [Page One]

A southern Kentucky town is up in arms over a request by a local tavern to allow pole dancers to be paid for entertaining patrons at a bar straddling the Kentucky-Tennessee line. [WLEX18]

Can you imagine suing your dentist because he dropped a small screwdriver down your throat? Lawwwwd. Talk about an awesome surgery. [H-L]

Remember the Clay County magistrate who stabbed his wife earlier this week and then killed himself? The 911 tape has been released. This is one of the most shocking and tragic stories we’ve seen in months. [WKYT]

The Kentucky Supreme Court says universities can’t ban guns in staff and student vehicles on campus. [C-J/AKN]

The esteemed KARL ROVE & CO. firm is out with its first electoral map of the season, and whoo boy does it show some kinda landslide for Barack Obama, giving him approximately 700 electoral votes. All in a push to skeer meemaw and your racist poppop into throwing cash at him. [Wonkette]

Just like that, the White House caved an scrapped child labor farm rules. So you can get back to enslaving your children. [HuffPo]

“You may never get to experience the thrill of entering the winner’s circle and smelling the wonderful aroma that emanates from the garland of roses that signifies the greatest achievement in the sport of Thoroughbred racing, but this wonderful book will take you on a journey that gets you as close as any piece of writing possibly could.” — From the foreword by Chris McCarron, two-time Kentucky Derby winner and Hall of Fame inductee

We’ve had a chance to read it and think any Derby fan should grab their own copy right away.

Here’s how to win a copy from Page One and The ‘Ville Voice:

Leave a comment on this post, email Jake or tweet about your favorite memory of the Kentucky Derby.

We’ll select two winners this Sunday so they can be in the mail on Monday.

Have at it!

The Lundergan Family brought President Bill Clinton back to Kentucky today and everyone in Lexington is still freaking out. [H-L]

That welfare recipient drug testing law in Georgia? Mmm hmm, it was supported by bad research. Somebody call Lonnie Napier’s hair dye and let it know. [HuffPo]

What would you do if your home, place of employment and entire community were wiped off the face of the earth by a tornado? Recovery in Eastern Kentucky will take a long time and only the Red Cross remains on the ground supporting the people who most need it. [Click Here To Give]

Today the White House announced that several schools in Kentucky are U.S. Department of Education Green Ribbon Schools: Rosa Parks Elementary School, Lexington; Georgetown Middle School, Georgetown; Richardsville Elementary School, Bowling Green. [Press Release]

Just like Greg Stumbo originally pretended that he didn’t know Kelly Flood and she pretended that she hated him because she’s friends with his ex-wife, he’s being less than honest in this situation. He most certainly did sit down with Republicans in the Senate and made promises to get what he wanted. [C-J/AKN]

Barack Obama’s top advisers are making a mid-“core” correction in their attacks on Mitt Romney — with a little nudge from Bill Clinton, who is finding a niche as an Obama campaign whisperer and fundraiser. [Politico]

Did you hear? Lexington Mayor Jim Gray is giving people money to put on hot pants and spread glitter everywhere. [WKYT]

Thomas Massie continues to insinuate that he’s been endorsed by Geoff Davis. He wanted desperately for Davis to endorse Webb-Embarrassment so he could get Liberty Christ to endorse him. That will likely happen now. [Head - Desk]

HAHAHA! PEE ALERT! Wingnut mouth-breathers are furious that Mittens Romney is going to bring his mormon cult games to Jerry Falwell’s pretend university. [Wonkette]

Poverty in America: Defining the New Poor. You should probably read this and give it some deep thought. [NPR]

Mouth-breather/evolution deniers are advancing their “cause” under the guise of free inquiry. But it’s a bunch of monkey kabuki. [The Economist]

The police chief in the Trayvon Martin case is stepping down. This means basically everyone on the case has had to quit because of being awful. [HuffPo]

The Kentucky Commission on Human Rights last week publicly accepted three conciliation agreements in fair housing cases, including one in Madison County. [John Cheves]

What would you do if your home, place of employment and entire community were wiped off the face of the earth by a tornado? Recovery in Eastern Kentucky will take a long time and only the Red Cross remains on the ground supporting the people who most need it. [Click Here To Give]

It appears sustained deadly catastrophe is all it took to get “Real Americans” to believe that Faux News was just foaming at the mouth about global warming being a myth. [Wonkette]

The worst of the worst in Kentucky had a racist circle jerk in Frankfort on Saturday. No one was arrested and only a few verbal incidents took place. It was really cute watching all the sheet-wearing mouth-breathers have a public shouting session. [C-J/AKN]

Cutting benefits for the poor and increasing the Pentagon budget sounds like the smart thing to do. Let’s let the poors fend for themselves as we assplode a bunch of the world or whatever. That’s the Mittens Romney way. [HuffPo]

Are we in the middle of the third industrial revolution? The digitization of manufacturing could transform the way goods are made and change the politics of jobs, too. [The Economist & More Economist]

Many of the country’s biggest media companies, which own dozens of newspapers and TV news operations, are flexing their muscle in Washington in a fight against a government initiative to increase transparency of political spending. [Pro Publica]

Nearly six years after an explosion killed five miners at Kentucky Darby Mine No. 1 in Harlan County, the operators have not paid nearly $700,000 in civil fines and interest fees for safety violations connected to the accident. [C-J/AKN]

Republican elite are holding off the teabaggers. So much for that teabagger takeover, kids. [Politico]

President Barack Obama will use a tour of election battleground states next (this) week to push Congress to prevent interest rates on federal student loans from doubling, a move that could appeal to middle-class and younger voters crucial to his re-election chances. [Reuters]

Was Papaw Beshear’s veto funtimes over road projects in David Williams’ district vindictive? Since he didn’t veto projects in, you know, the district of anyone else? [WFPL]

What would you do if your home, place of employment and entire community were wiped off the face of the earth by a tornado? Recovery in Eastern Kentucky will take a long time and only the Red Cross remains on the ground supporting the people who most need it. [Click Here To Give]

Today, John Yarmuth issued a statement about the Ohio River Bridges Debacle. He didn’t mention River Fields or the stunts five wealthy families in Louisville have pulled for decades to kill progress. Instead, he claimed the bridges nightmare is necessary for progress in Kentucky. [Press Release]

Really, the entire state is getting the shaft. John Yarmuth and Steve Beshear are turning a blind eye and/or actively participating. Tolls, tolls, tolls! [Page One]

The Council on Postsecondary Education set caps Friday on how much tuition can increase at Kentucky’s public universities, a move that indicates how much those schools will probably charge this fall. [H-L]

The NRA is growing out of touch with modern Americans and even with its own members—who, according to surveys, now tend to support restrictions such as mandatory background checks on buyers of weapons at gun shows. The future does not look bright, either. Despite attempts to attract women, most convention-goers in St Louis were white men over the age of 40—a segment of the population on the decline. The classified sections in NRA magazines such as American Rifleman feature, besides all the weaponry, advertisements for gardening equipment and Viagra. [The Economist]

WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE OF THE MEASLES!!1! [WLEX18]

Common Cause has nationally spoken out in opposition to placement agents being used by retirement organizations like Kentucky Retirement Systems. So where is Common Cause Kentucky? Yep, silent. It’s time for Richard B. to move along and let someone paying attention take the helm. [KRS Failures]

Of course Mittens Romney is blaming President Barack Obama for a plant that closed during George W. Bush’s failed presidency. [Wonkette]

According to the White House, Kimberly Shearer of Boon Co High School is 2012 State Teacher of the Year in Kentucky. [Press Release]

Mittens Romney is having a tough time convincing Republicans that he can win. And everybody else, of course. [Politico]

An IRS complaint has been filed against that crazy cat-lick bishop who compared President Barack Obama to Adolph Hitler and Joseph Stalin. [HuffPo]

The Kentucky Supreme Court heard the appeal of a judge kicked out of office by the Judicial Conduct Commission. Fitting that Marcus Carey is the guy’s attorney. [H-L]

What would you do if your home, place of employment and entire community were wiped off the face of the earth by a tornado? Recovery in Eastern Kentucky will take a long time and only the Red Cross remains on the ground supporting the people who most need it. [Click Here To Give]

Dear Readers: Who from Kentucky do you know that’s affiliated with Gineen Bresso’s campaign in Florida? Any consultants from Kentucky campaigns working for her? Because her campaign has illegally harvested thousands of email addresses. [Deep Floriduh Failures]

Way to go, Eastern Kentucky. Thanks for embarrassing the entire Commonwealth again . [HuffPo]

You know what’s unfortunate? The Kentucky Democratic Republican Party is working overtime to trash Sarah Lynn Cunningham. She’s running as a Democratic in the 19th State Senate District amongst the KDRP’s chosen boy, Morgan. Beshear’s crew have gone so far to call various unions to prohibit them from granting her an interview. And you wonder why the Democrats in Frankfort continue to fall apart. [Democratic Failure]

Virginia Foxx simply does not care for you damn kids and your debt. This heinous witch is half the reason the United States is in the pooper. [Wonkette]

Just like that, hospitals are starting to sue the state’s new Medicaid managed care plans. Appalachian Regional Healthcare sued Centene on the state level and Coventry in federal court. Cat fights are just beginning. [Deep Medicaid Thoughts]

Way to go, Lexington! A fire on Sheridan Drive on Thursday burned unchecked for several minutes, destroying a family’s kitchen, because the nearest fire engine had temporarily been taken out of service. [H-L]

You know you love you some cat fight between Papaw Beshear and David Williams. You just wish slapping were involved. [FOX41]

Low social status is bad for your health and biologists are beginning to understand why. [The Economist]

Ben Chandler can’t be bothered to deal with his constituents on any personal level. And he most certainly can’t be bothered with answering tough questions. But he’s sure got time to file bills congratulating a sports team. [Ben Chandler]

Michele Beard Bachmann, one of the dumbest women to ever live, is now using “tar baby” (yes, really) when discussing President Barack Obama. [Wonkette]

Careful what you wish for, teabaggers. Now the Republican Establishment is using Super PACs to restrain you. [HuffPo]

A Bowling Green doctor says the Kentucky House Speaker should stop pretending he knows what the majority of physicians, nurses, and dentists thinks regarding a prescription drug bill. [WKU Public Radio]

What would you do if your home, place of employment and entire community were wiped off the face of the earth by a tornado? Recovery in Eastern Kentucky will take a long time and only the Red Cross remains on the ground supporting the people who most need it. [Click Here To Give]

Now officials say it’s just a rumor that Calumet Farm is being sold. Did Paulick get it wrong? Ruh ro. [H-L]

Lexington television stations are basing their reports on the original story we linked early this morning. [WKYT]

Oh, cute, here’s a nice little story about Kenyans involving President Barack Obama’s father. It’s sure to send racist mouth-breathers into a tailspin. [BBC]

Greg Fischer ran on a platform of JOBS, JOBS, JOBS. Unfortunately for him, his signature Ohio River Bridges Debacle moves thousands upon thousands of jobs out of Louisville. [The 'Ville Voice]

Bogota, New Jersey, police officer Regina Tasca responded to a call about a young man who was being erratic. She was supposed to transport him to the hospital. Two of her fellow officers, though, thought they were more supposed to jump on him and kick him in the head and shit — you know, the law! Tasca jumped in and managed to pry the officers off the young man. What do you suppose has happened since? A commendation, maybe? Definitely a commendation right? [Wonkette]

If Greg Fischer is pushing a piece of legislation, you know it’s 100% flawed and should be immediately scrapped. [WFPL]

A State Senate panel put David Williams’ vetoed road projects into the transportation budget. Which means the cat fight will never end. [H-L]

Whattya mean another mouth-breathing Republican is spewing Anti-Semitic tripe? Comparing smoking bans to Hitler’s “Jewish Stars.” Jesus H. Christ people are dumb as hell. Republican leadership needs to own up to these shenanigans and address them head-on, unlike Eric Cantor. [HuffPo & More HuffPo]

The 20 best small towns in America? None of them are in the Commonwealth of Kentucky, according to this list. [Smithsonian Magazine]